There was this skirt. It was very simple, really. Straight, taupe, plain, but, boy, did it fit well! When I bought it, it was a bit too snug, but it was on clearance. Once I became slender enough to wear it, it was my favorite. It was amazing. I could throw it on with flats and a sweater and be filled with confidence. I could slip it on with heels and a silk blouse and feel, well, like an adult. After the craziness of college, somehow I had managed to land on my feet. Slimmer than I’d ever been, I had a great job working for arguably the most influential man in the state, and, an office on the top floor with a huge window overlooking the courthouse and much of downtown. Life was good. And, then, came the invitation. I was invited out after work with the beautiful people, the smart people, the movers and the shakers, so to speak. Although looking back, I believe the skirt was invited. It was a great time! We bantered, laughed, and flirted. We even became a little snarky and sarcastic. I simply sparkled. I delivered a beautifully timed one-liner regarding a less than stellar co-worker which resulted in guffaws and snorts from everyone. All except for her. While being walked to my car by one of the handsome associates, I simply floated. My feet did not even touch the pavement.
A mere three traffic lights later, the face of my insulted co-worker was the only thing I could see. At that moment, the cost I was about to pay for this version of success became crushing. You see, I had made many mistakes before, but I always considered myself silly or airheaded, or even unwise, but, never had I thought myself unkind. The Holy Spirit used that thought to pierce me through. I couldn’t breathe. It made me angry that it bothered me so much. It wasn’t that bad! So, I began an angry prayer:
God, I am not rededicating my life – again! I told You I wanted to be Yours when I was five. I tried it again when I was eleven, and, again when I was twenty. It never sticks. I can’t make it stick. I am good for a little while, and then I just go back to being worse than ever. I will not do it this time. This time, it is up to You. If You want me, Lord, I am Yours. Make me be what You want me to be. I give You permission to make me like what You like and hate what You hate, especially those things in me. I am not going to try at all. This time, it’s all You, God. Here I am.
Oh, my! Surrender. I had never really understood, and . . .
I have never been the same.
Adoration: God is holy, mighty, gracious, and merciful. Spend time declaring your love for Him and expressing your thoughts of praise and worship.
Confession: Ask God to search your heart and reveal any areas of unconfessed sin. Acknowledge these to the Lord and thank Him for His forgiveness.
Thanksgiving: Express your thankfulness to God for the blessings He has given you. When we consider that we deserve punishment because of our sinfulness, and instead God gives to us His love and mercy, our only response should be one of thankfulness.
Supplication: Petition God for spiritual insight and understanding of His Word. Ask Him to help you know what is His direction and purpose for your life. Intercede for other believers, personal friends, those in ministry and those who are oppressed and in need. Offer prayers for your activities for this day and any special concerns you might have.