Read Ephesians 4:25-32
A few years ago, I had a friend who was struggling with her teenage son. He was always angry! Wanting to help, I did a little bit of research. What I learned was that anger is considered a secondary emotion, meaning that it is always caused by something else. In the case of teenage boys, studies show the reason for anger is usually fear. They feel the pressure of completing high school, choosing a college, getting a job, meeting a girl, being accepted by peers, and the list goes on. Instead of admitting they’re afraid, they get angry. My friend talked with her son about fear and pressure, and the anger went away. She dealt with the root cause of his anger instead of focusing on the anger itself, and that made all the difference.
Ephesians warns us about not letting the sun go down on our anger, but how do we manage to not sin when we’re angry? It has to do with dealing with the root cause of why we’re angry, admitting that someone hurt our feelings or disappointed us, or caused us to miss out on something we wanted. Or whatever. Suppressed anger is not healthy, and it leads to sin. We need to take a step back, figure out the root cause of our anger, and then deal with that issue instead of staying angry. When we go to bed and stew in our anger, no one benefits. It is then that Satan sneaks in and establishes a foothold.